Fiona and The Four Agreements

Quick update: Fiona's doing great! We are back to riding more often. Her trust in me has grown by leaps and bounds. We even rode across the property the other day. It was unbelievable! The tractor and the feed cart went by and she never waivered. I love that little horse. She's really turning out OK. We are in the process of getting a new saddle. She outgrew the old one and it started to pinch her. I think it was even starting to make her buck a bit into the trot and canter. oh yes, we canter now! ..well, we are just getting started...but it HAS happened! I am still trying to get some video done. I am holding out for a cantering video though, so it might still be a bit. On to the subject at hand.....

There's a book called The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz. If you haven't read it, I HIGHLY recommend it! In short, the book describes four rules to live your life by which will help you grow spiritually and move in the world more easily. Well, at least that's what these rules have done for me.

Here are the "agreements" or rules:
1) Be impeccable with your word

2) Don't take anything personally

3) Don't make assumptions

4) Always do your best

I read this book a long time ago, but I read something on a horse trainer's website that triggered one of the rules to pop into my head. "Be impeccable with your word". The exact words I read are not important, but the underlying message was "The horse needs work."

The most important thing I have learned in the last few months is, the horse is just fine, the owner needs work. Horse owners HATE to hear this. I HATE to hear this. It makes me feel like I am broken or not good enough. This thought leads RIGHT into the next agreement. "Don't take things personally".

One of the great things about working with horses is you are NEVER done. There's always more my horse can teach me and there's an endless number of "sports" I can teach my horse to participate in. There's dressage, endurance, barrels, poles, trail riding, the list goes on and on. So the statement "the owner needs work" really means the journey hasn't ended, not that I am broken or inadequate. It means I am still alive! This is what living is about...moving forward, learning, working, playing.

I don't have a clean segway into the next rule, but it definitely applies to horsemanship. "Don't make assumptions" Don't assume that the horse is the problem. The horse is never the problem. The saddle can be the problem (which I had happen recently). The owner can definitely be the problem. Lack of knowledge can be the problem. It's our job as good horse owners to discover our the truth about our horses, based on the facts. So don't just guess or assume that you know the root cause of an issue. Do your own investigation. If your horse bucks you off, change things and see what makes it better..or God forbid, worse.

The last rule applies so much to horsemanship, I can't even fit it all into one blog post. "Always do your best". Now I think most people interpret or apply this rule when they want to bail out early and quit what they are trying to do before they are done. I don't often have that issue, unless I am afraid and even when I am afraid of something with my horse, I come back and keep trying. I have to apply this rule when I don't get to my goal in the timeframe I want to and then I tend to beat myself up for it. You don't hit a grand slam every day. As a co-dependent Capricorn, that is very hard for me to accept. I have a goal every day, week, month and year. If I miss one, it's a disappointment. Yes, my standards are WAY too high. Sometimes your best isn't your all-time, record setting best, and that's OK. :)

Hopefully this helps some people in their work and play with horses.